The closest people to me all have one thing in common. They believe the best about me and call it out in me whenever possible.
My mom tells everyone she meets that her daughter is a missionary, which technically I am, but only part time, and it’s not the only job that I have. But my mother is not deterred by words like “part time” or “lack of fundraising.” If you talked to her, you’d think that I was off changing the world every day of the week. Why? Because she believes the best about me and wants to call it out in me in front of others, almost as if she’s the head of my marketing company (which totally doesn’t exist).
My friend Vera tells everyone I’m a comedian. I’m not really but I did do a few stints on a standup comedy stage. It was easily the most exciting and equally terrifying thing I’ve ever done, but I didn’t persevere long enough to be taken seriously in it and I never made any money at it. But that doesn’t faze Vera. She tells everyone she introduces me to that I’m a comedian. Why? Because she believes the best in me and wants to pave the way for my success.
If you talked to my best friend Anjuli, you’d think that I was equally the funniest and wisest person you ever met (which, I assure you, I am not). She’s lifted me up out of many a dark place just by speaking into me the person who she believes that I am. Why? Because she believes the best about me and wants me to believe it about myself.
Now, there are plenty of people you could ask about me that would whole heartedly disagree. They could point out plenty of my flaws. They could tell you how I’m late more often then I’m on time. They could tell you about how in debt I am (student loans are the bain of my existence) or the fact that I’m not in as good physical shape as I once was.
But I don’t concern myself with those people. They aren’t the ones that bolster me upward toward love and success, so I do my best to pay them as little attention as possible.
When I do need a word of correction, though, someone to call me out when I’m in the wrong, guess who I’m willing to listen to? It’s not the critics. It’s those who have lifted me up. It’s their correction that I can trust. I can believe, even when they correct me, that the heart of it is good.
It’s a powerful thing to be lifted up by someone you care about. It can mold our children into who they’ll become.
I want to be this kind of encourager to my son. I want to be like my mother, like Vera, like Anjuli. I want to be someone who lifts him up instead of pushing him down, someone who sets him up for success and lifts him out of dark places.
I know that my son will need correction, but I plan on surrounding him with more encouraging words than critical ones, because he’ll get enough of that from the rest of the world.
There will be enough judging peers and people that will put him down. There will be enough well meaning authority figures that will try to cut him down to size to further their own agenda.
But that won’t be me. I’ll be the one to lift him up, to believe the best in him.
Who are the people that have lifted you up? How have they helped mold you into a better person? What’s the best way that you lift your child up? Share it with us! Post it below in the comments and let’s start a conversation about lifting each other up.
~Care
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